Be Alert, the world desperately needs more Lerts…


From the dimmest mists of ancient internet times, one thing has remained as a universal constant regarding the internet. I see stupid people

There is absolutely no doubt or question that there are some brilliant people who post stuff on the internet. Yet even though this is an indisputable truth, it isn’t the rule for the internet. If the internet has one single involute rule, it is this. If you say or do something monumentally stupid, it is going to end up on the internet for the entire world to see and laugh about.

Here, please allow me to give you an example of exactly such an act of monumental stupidity captured for all posterity and the entire world to laugh at.

Slate: Only bad people won’t sacrifice their children on altar of public education, or something.

We still have four more months left in 2013, but we may have found a winner for the single most vapid column of the year, courtesy of Slate. Allison Benedikt wrote a “manifesto” which appeared on their site today demanding that parents stop using private schools for their children, because — and I am not making this up — putting more children in failing schools is the path to improvement. Benedikt begins her argument by pronouncing herself ignorant on education policy, and proceeds to demonstrate a nearly endless supply of ignorance throughout the rest of the article.

Actually, I’ve gotten ahead of myself. She starts off her argument by pronouncing anyone who does not put their children in public schools a “bad person”:

You are a bad person if you send your children to private school. Not bad like murderer bad—but bad like ruining-one-of-our-nation’s-most-essential-institutions-in-order-to-get-what’s-best-for-your-kid bad. So, pretty bad.

Take a moment to mull over that gem. Benedikt’s entire argument is that non-participants in an organization ruin it by their non-participation. It’s not the actual participants who are to blame for the institution’s failures – not the teachers, not the administrators, and not the policy-makers — but the people who avoid the failure that should be blamed. That argument conveniently lets the participants in this “most-essential” institution off the hook for their own failures. We’ll get back to that in a minute.

With that in mind, Benedikt then pronounces her ignorance on the subject, while demanding that children get sacrificed in the failing institutions for generations on the off chance that things will improve … by osmosis, or something:

I am not an education policy wonk: I’m just judgmental. But it seems to me that if every single parent sent every single child to public school, public schools would improve. This would not happen immediately. It could take generations. Your children and grandchildren might get mediocre educations in the meantime, but it will be worth it, for the eventual common good.

News Flash to Allison Benedikt, you are not just judgmental, you are in fact, a complete and total imbecile. Allison, if their were an intellectual version of the Darwin Awards, you would have an entire catagory of intellectual Darwin award named after you, that’s how stupid your argument is. The reason public schools are a failure is not because intelligent and financial capably parent send their children to private schools or home school them, no, they send their children to private schools or home school them because they do not want their children in schools that are utter and complete failures.

Here’s another news flash for you Allison, not all Americans are OK with imbeciles like you, (who, by the way are so damned stupid, that by comparison you make a bucket of used camel snot look like Albert Einstein), indoctrinate their children into Marxism or pushing on them morals and ethics that they personally find repugnant.

Yes Allison, American’s are by the millions, opting out of the public education system because they do not want their children being forced to receive a substandard education or to be indoctrinated into political, religious, moral or ethical values that they do not agree with. Allison, you and the other morally depraved moral busybodies pushing politically correct cr4ap and Marxism through the public educations system are exactly who CS Lewis was speaking about when he wrote this profoundly prophetic warning.

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron’s cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.
C. S. Lewis

Fortunately for the rest of us, your mind numbing stupidity has been captured and preserved like a mosquito in amber for everyone to mock, ridicule and laugh at. Hell, knowing the nature of the internet, it’s entirely possible that an intellectual Darwin Award catagory will be created in your honor now…

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2 thoughts on “Be Alert, the world desperately needs more Lerts…

  1. The problem with stupid people is that they think it is because of the system that they are stupid, when it is because of stupid people that the system is in a mess……..

  2. “But it seems to me that if every single parent sent every single child to public school, public schools would improve. This would not happen immediately. It could take generations. Your children and grandchildren might get mediocre educations in the meantime, but it will be worth it, for the eventual common good. ”

    So let’s apply that logic to other products & services:

    ‘If every single person dined at lousy restaurants, those lousy restaurants would improve’. ‘
    ‘If ever single person bought dangerous medications that had side effects that killed them, those medicines would stop killing people.’
    ‘If every single child ran out in traffic & got hit by cars, eventually kids would stop running out in traffic.’

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